Social Anxiety to Social Confidence

The latest TV craze this week has been Susan Boyle, a 47 year old unemployed church volunteer with crazy hair who has never been kissed, but has a voice to knock anyone’s socks off. She is one of the contestants in the new series of ITV’s Britain’s Got Talent competition. Whether they love or hate the show, I find it hard to believe that anyone would not be surprised and moved by the performance, especially after she does that thing with her hips! For those who have not seen it, just click this picture to view the YouTube video.

The obvious question is, since she’s never been kissed, does she have social anxiety? Given her cheeky attitude on and off stage you would think probably not, but social anxiety is complex and very individual for all experiencing it. You could blame her lack of love on something like her fuzzy hair and unplucked eyebrows, but I think that would be a shallow view to take. One also might be swayed towards thinking it was for religious reasons given her involvement in church, but the way she said it suggested a cover of sadness and regret, dismissing that it was something done through personal choice.

Although the underlying fears are very similar, there is often a lot of variation in social anxiety. Some people with social anxiety can be very socially confident in many social situations, but then terrified in others. It is not uncommon for people to be very sociable and outgoing but then crumple when attempting to become intimately involved with someone they are attracted to, or similarly, when they have to do public speaking. Some people might be more comfortable in pairs while others might like the camouflage of a large group and while most people go very quiet, some others talk endlessly in fear of uncomfortable silences.

Of course it could be that she had social anxiety but has recently overcome it enabling her to suddenly fulfil her dreams, or a reason completely unrelated to social anxiety. At the end of the day, only one person really knows the truth, and that is Susan herself. Whatever the reason, I am sure it will not be long now before she does find love, especially with a voice like hers. Let us hope they are everything she desires them to be and she fulfils all her dreams.